celine.
celine.
celine.

5.05.2005


i am so bored..nakakailang posts na ko.. wala lang.. hindi ko na alam kung pano ko ipuput into words lahat ng nararamdaman ko.. sheesh..

celine took a bite @ 5/05/2005 12:22:00 PM
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stigmatized

If I give up on you I give up on me
If we fight what's true, will we ever be
Even God himself and the faith I knew
Shouldn't hold me back, shouldn't keep me from you
Tease me, by holding out your hand
Then leave me, or take me as i am
And live our lives, stigmatized
I can feel the blood rushing though my veins
When i hear your voice, driving me insane
Hour after hour day after day
Every lonely night that i sit and pray
We live our lives on different sides,
But we keep together you and I
Just live our lives, stigmatized
We'll live our lives, We'll take the punches everyday
We'll live our lives I know we're gonna find our way
I believe in you
Even if no one understands
I believe in you, and i don't really give a damn
If we're stigmatized
We live our lives on different sides
But we keep together you and I
We live our lives on different sides
We gotta live our lives
Gotta live our lives
Were gonna live our lives
We're gonna live our lives,
Gonna live our lives,
Stigmatized

celine took a bite @ 5/05/2005 12:05:00 PM
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sorry...

if not for me, you would not have to hurt this way.. im sorry..

celine took a bite @ 5/05/2005 12:03:00 PM
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i am not there

i am here.
just here.
though i know i need to be there.
it pains me to see you this way.
i hope i had the power to make everything just fine.
i hope i can make you stay.
i hope to give you just about everything.
i hate it that all my hopes remain a dream.

celine took a bite @ 5/05/2005 11:53:00 AM
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taggers?

to those who tagged me..
eka: tam! miss you! see you soon..
macy: imiss you!! 5 ngayon.. happy!!! hahaha.. ayan ah.. di ko nakalimutan
mary: kahit di naman ako umoo, nilink mo na ko eh.. hahaha pero ayos lang. nilink di kita.. haha

mian: your blog deserves to be patronized!!
pauline: ayos lang naman.. haha.. congrats at pumayag din lola mo sa UP..
sam: i love you!! salamat talaga..
kitten: ayan na.. inupdate ko na!=p

celine took a bite @ 5/05/2005 09:50:00 AM
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no cohesion

i don't wanna write here, actually.. but ive got a couple of reasons why im writing:
    • i haven't written anything here in 12 days
    • kitten said it's time to update my blog
    • i'll be gone for another 12 days. i promise to write about it when i get back.
    • i have nothing to do (besides packing), and
    • no ones online's worth talking to.
here are some reasons why i haven't been writing:
    • everytime i go online, there's someone online i want to talk to.
    • i find more joy in reading other blogs.
    • i dont think anyone reads this. So if you do, tag me. so i know someone does.
    • my minds all messed up. this blog has no cohesion at all.
so there, here are some things i've done since april 24. it's not chronologically arranged for i don't remember when ive done it.
    • i finished my 1000 piece puzzle. someone was proud of me for that! (yey!ü)
    • ilearned to do this.. ü all i knew before was this..Ü
    • i finished a 500 piece puzzle in6 hours.. nothing to be proud of since it was so easy.
    • i had lunch with ms windsor, gaye, mian, ivy, aileen, lea, vanessa, telle, and kookie
    • i watched can this be love on its first day with gaye, mian, ivy, aileen, lea and telle
    • i went swimming at marga's place since it was so hot in the afternoon.
    • i went swimming at tivoli royale with my family
    • i drank a half bottle of beer.
    • i ate sundae ice mix at mcdonalds.
    • i commuted alone going to katipunan because no one can take me there.it was my first time and i acutally didn't know how.
    • i had dirty ice cream at UP with gaye, mian, aileen,telle, and ms windsor
    • i saw ms windsor eat ice cream. daig pa niya ang bata
    • i had isaw manok at UP with the same people
    • i sat down sa sunken garden sa UP. again, with the same people.
    • a huge red ant bit me.
    • i commuted going home but this time, i was with gaye.
    • i enrolled at la salle.
    • i had a chest x-ray. it was my first time.. i think..
    • i talked to someone i didn't want to talk to for about an hour. some demon got into me, i guess.
    • someone wrote me a poem. thank you someone!!üüü
    • God answered my prayer. I could not thank Him enough. A sincere prayer works big time..

sheesh.. i just realized through the list above that this blog is all about me. it is all about what i do and what i need to do and what i want.. i have a couple of questions.. to those who have nothing to do.. please answer them for me.. either write a comment or tag me.. thank you..

    • does having a blog mean you're selfish because everything is just about you?
    • or would it be better if you only wrote about you?
    • will writing about somebody else's life mean you're gossipping?
    • do you write in your blog so the world would read it or do you write it because you just want to write?
    • after summer, will you still write in your blog or would you just leave it hanging until the next summer?

enough questions.. i remembered a message sam sent me. i told her that i would write it here.. she told me this because i feel the world is pulling me away from you.. you know who you are.. or at least i hope you do.. here's a part of sam's message:

"if you believe in what you have, if you believe that you can make it, if you
believe in everything made by what you've got, don't let anything ruin it.
As long as you believe."

well, i believe. i hope you also believe.

celine took a bite @ 5/05/2005 08:59:00 AM
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4.23.2005

im back

yes.. im back.. i have not been writing for the past few days for one reason-- i've nothing to write.. i dont know what it is with me.. i was so empty.. literally.. no thoughts, no memories, no nothing.. when i stare at something.. i only think of that something.. nothing else enters my mind.. nothing that that something reminds me of.. sheesh.. i hate being empty.. id rather be sad and cry all day.. for that can only mean my life has something to live for..
but i think my being empty ended 2 days ago.. i went out with some of my classmates--eka, lea, nicole, diego, pearl and nikki.. we met up in school... then ms windsor was there.. so we chatted for about an hour before we left for robinsons galleria.. we wanted her to come but then she said that she didn't plan for it so she couldn't.. and she said gateway was better.. hopefully, we'll go there next week... maybe with her... (to all eavesdroppers reading this, hope you could come.. birthday na ni ms winsor sa tueday)..
then we headed to galle.. we ate at wham! burgers.. after eating, we watched guess who.. for those who don't know the movie, ashton kutcher (correct the spelling if im wrong) and some black girl.. it was nice.. in all fairness.. so back to my story.. after the movie, we went to dreamscape.. we rode the bump cars.. then, we window shopped.. literally... nobody bought anything.. things were too expensive because we did not have money.. after strolling around, we went to ice monster.. the guy in front of us paid 935 php.. sheesh.. talk about a long wait for my ice monster to come.. ao when we got our ice monsters.. it was timeto go back to katipunan.. but pearl did not ride with us because she had ballet near the mall.. so i gave her her ice monster.. well..i gave her the wrong ice monster.. stupid me.. i gave her watermelon (which was nicole's by the way) instead of strawberry.. (sorry pearl and nicole..)we only found out when we have already ridden eka's van.. (hi eka!!!)
so there.. going back to katipunan was fast.. it only took us 12 minutes to get back.. so i arrived national bookstore at 4:28 pm.. my parents arrived 4:30.. so i rode our car... my brothers were there... so i guess we had somewhere to go to.. and yes.. i was right.. we brought our dad in some place called legend villas.. it was beside robinsons pioneer.. for those who dont know the place.. it is the robinsons along edsa where no one goes to.. i know why people dont go there.. people dont go there because there is no reason to.. oh wait!! there's one.. it is very easy to park.. the parking lot is half empty... you can play bump cars if you want.. haha... the mall is even smaller than robinsons metro east.. it has only two floors. no. three.. but only the movie house is in the third floor.. and guess what? the mall did not have a fast food chain.. sheesh.. it was that small.. and the department store was as big as the ladies section in the department store of robinson's galleria.. haha.. enough insulting.. haha.. there.. we ate dinner.. and since we had nothing to do.. we went to the arcade.. which by the way did not have a name.. it wasn't even furnished.. the walls were literally hollow blocks put together.. no paint.. and there was not much to do.. but the tokens were only 5 pesos.. and guess what? if you buy 20 tokens, they give you 15 free.. but the sad part is no tickets go out of the machines.. they had no prizes.. sheesh.. there.. when we finished the tokens.. we went back to legend villas to pick up my dad.. and then we went home... yey!!
it was such a long long day...
but it was all worth it...
truly, being with 4-6 is an escape... my escape from my reality..

celine took a bite @ 4/23/2005 09:31:00 AM
1 shared with her


4.13.2005

what to do..

please tell me what to do with my life..
i hate being a bum...

celine took a bite @ 4/13/2005 12:53:00 PM
1 shared with her



STUPID

i am so stupid..
i have been so stupid for the past few years...
i did not realize until now that what i believe in is totally wrong..
i dwelled too much on something superficial...
having this realization,
i will no longer dwell on that something..
i will now dwell on something worth my time..
it is gonna be hard..
really..
i know it is because i have been so used to dwelling on that something..
it is only a matter of adjustment and sacrifice..
i can do this...
i can.
i can.
i can.
I CAN.
if you understand what im trying to say..
know that i love you..
so much..
but this is for the better...

celine took a bite @ 4/13/2005 10:28:00 AM
0 shared with her


4.12.2005

para sa 4-6

i remembered just now what mian wrote before...
i've written about it before..

4-6 is an escape...

i need that escape right now..
i need that laughter and the joy you guys bring me..
i need that love you share with me..
i ned that hug that comforts me..
i need that smile that says "i care"..
i need that family that shows me where i belong..
i need that escape..
i need to escape from my pain..

and i thought id be escaping from that pain tomorrow..
i hoped to see you tomorrow..

but i'm still hoping to see you someday...i not soon..
i love you guys..

celine took a bite @ 4/12/2005 06:57:00 PM
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HOW TO BE ME...

















-END-

celine took a bite @ 4/12/2005 03:34:00 PM
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4.11.2005

next blog

wala akong magawa.. so i decided to click the "next blog" button on the upper right hand corner of this site.. dinala niya ko sa site na to.. http://2completelyopposingthoughts.blogspot.com/ and i read some articles.. ang ganda nung isa.. here it goes..

"I’m standing on the edge of a cliff.

I want to jump and it seems so simple.

Just lift your legs and propel yourself forward.

But what I can’t figure out is how to tell my brain to tell my
legs to jump.

There is something missing inside of me; the link between
my brain and my feet.

How does one strive towards honesty, integrity and self
love if all they’ve ever learned and practiced is the opposite?

I have always thought of myself and a compassionate, selfless and
self-aware person.

I am starting to realize however that everything I
once though about myself is crumbling around me like a sand castle in a rising
tide.

My layers are melting away and I am faced with my naked self in the mirror
questioning every motive for every thing I think and every action that I take.

Am I really doing things for others out of the goodness of
my heart? Am I motivated, in fact by selflessness or rather selfishness? Do I
even know the difference?"

celine took a bite @ 4/11/2005 10:13:00 AM
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maalaala mo kaya

i just remembered.. i was watching maalaala mo kaya last thursday... and then one character said..
"sana lahat ng tao kaya harapin yung nakaraan nila.. para walang
nasasaktan.. walang naiiwan.. walang nagagalit.. walang umaasa.."

sana nga...

celine took a bite @ 4/11/2005 09:45:00 AM
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4.10.2005

i love swimming..

went to 9 waves yesterday.. yes.. you read it right 9 waves.. hindi eight.. sa san mateo rizal un.. ayun.. the place was nice.. 3 pools.. one wave pool, one big kiddie pool, and one pool na 3 to 6 feet.. i got to have the 6 feet pool for myself for about 15 minutes.. i missed swimming.. so niluboslublos ko na.. at ang itim ko na ngayon.. hahaÜ but it was fun.. really really fun.. hahaÜ
i really love swimming..

celine took a bite @ 4/10/2005 08:45:00 PM
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4.07.2005

bored..

this past few days..
walang nangyayari..
ang boring..
kaya wala rinako masyadong nasusulat dito..
pero nung tuesday, someone texted me..
i met him nung friday at my friend's kuya's grad party..
pinsan siya nung friend ko..
he asked for my number kasi may sun ako..
kaya yun...
ganito yung usap namin..
pangalanan natin siyang takbo... (ang weird nung name..)
here it goes...

takbo: the weather is relatively cool today, wouldn't you agree, celine? nu ngyon?Ü

celine: ano nga naman ngayon?Ü wala kang magawa noh?Ü

takbo: right you are! by the way, today is tuesday!Ü

celine: tama!Ü and tomorrow is wednesday..Ü

takbo: you dont say!Ü by the way, what is your favorite day?Ü

celine: seryosong tanong ba to?Ü

takbo: yeah. mine is thursday.Ü

celine: why thursday?

takbo: unfair! answer the question first.Ü

celine: wedenesday?Ü so why thursday?

takbo: thursday- because i become so restless, and excited because in my subconscious all i think about is the week's ending and that tomorrow's fridayÜ why wednesday?

celine: because it's in the middle of the week..Ü labo..Ü

takbo: yes you are. and that's what make people interesting..Ü

celine:okay..Ü

ayun.. ang weird lang.. yun lang..

nga pala.. yung entry before this.. di na sha totoo ngayon.. I AM HAPPY...

celine took a bite @ 4/07/2005 07:55:00 AM
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4.05.2005

pain...

yan.. yan ang nararamdaman ko ngayon..
dapat nga hindi eh.. im supposed to be happy...
pero it just hit me..
i am so clueless..
hindi ko pala kilala ung taong dapat kilala ko talaga..
dapat ako ung may kilala sa kanya ng buong buo..
pero bakit hindi? bakit parang mas kilala pa siya ng buong mundo kesa sakin?
ang sakit..

celine took a bite @ 4/05/2005 02:33:00 PM
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4.04.2005

sick

i am so sick....

celine took a bite @ 4/04/2005 02:09:00 PM
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4.01.2005

bum...

ang hirap maging bum...
kaya nagayon.. bumubuo akon g 1000 pieces na puzzle.. ang hirap..
kasama ko ate ko..
sinimulan namin kanina.. gilid lang natapos namin..
ang saya.. sakit sa ulo...
sobra..

celine took a bite @ 4/01/2005 04:44:00 PM
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Name: celine

the world can go on without me.. so i might as well move with it..


Email: Make my day.

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